


Time Skip

by artgirl130



Series: My poetry [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: F/M, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:34:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25914448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artgirl130/pseuds/artgirl130
Summary: This poem is about someone I used to know.
Series: My poetry [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1880722
Kudos: 1





	Time Skip

**Author's Note:**

> I know it's a bit too long but I needed to unleash everything to do with him. Sorry if it sucks. Let me know what you think.

You were magnificent  
Smart, funny, effervescent  
You knocked me off of my feet with a smile and a balloon  
I'd always loved Halloween  
But you made that one special

Time skip, months later  
My birthday  
I'd given my number to your mother  
Hoped you'd call or text  
You did.  
Stayed up for hours talking  
I've never been too fond of my birthday  
But you made it special

Time skip, next Saturday  
Time flew by  
I was scared  
Intimidated by you  
I couldn't quite believe you were there with me  
Then you weren't and I was home

Time skip,  
You backed out of plans  
It was ok, your health was more important  
You said you wouldn't do it again.

Time skip,  
You did.

Before you did, you met my friends  
I was happy, nervous  
Trying to work up the courage to tell you how I felt  
At the park  
At the piano  
At the fountain

I didn't.  
You did.

Time skip,  
Oxford trip  
Tongue tied text confession  
I like you  
Delayed reply  
Start to cry

Stop

I like you too...

But

I like you  
You're lovely  
But -  
Better single.  
Rarely seen.  
Stringing along.  
Divided.  
Torn.

Someone else will love you  
I didn't want them,  
I wanted you

Scream in frustration  
Friends  
How?  
When you dodge my texts  
Sent every other day  
To see if you were ok  
So as not to scare you off  
I was scared.

At last, reply  
You were tired  
Like I was not  
You didn't think I'd want you there  
How could I not?  
When after everything you still held so much of me?

Radio silence  
And I cursed the times  
I stayed up late  
Clinging to the thought that you'd respond

Nothing.

A thousand apologies spilled from my lips  
My fingertips  
Darting over the keys  
To get you to talk to me

I didn't do anything

Time skip, nearly a month  
Nothing, then  
A conversation like before  
Reconnecting  
Sparking  
Ache forgotten  
You.  
I wanted it to last

It didn't.  
You didn't.

Time skip, October  
You said you were busy  
I said ok  
I always said ok

Confided in you about my hair  
Nothing important  
Didn't want to hurt  
Laughed at  
Why don't I learn?

Time skip,  
Bonfire night  
You eased my fear of fireworks

Time skip, mid November  
What do you want for Christmas?

3am texts in German that I couldn't read  
I fell further  
Hating myself for it  
I couldn't hate you

Don't get me a present!  
I haven't gotten you one  
I know.  
That's not who you are.  
It was ok.

I sent your present  
Expecting nothing  
You called  
My heart flipped  
Your voice.  
You.  
I hated myself.  
We made plans

Sat for hours  
Waiting  
Desperate for you to show  
You didn't.

Angry texts  
Burning eyes  
Start to cry  
Tight throat  
Want to choke

I understood

Why couldn't I hate you?

Nothing.

One conversation  
Brief.  
But we seemed like us again  
Abruptly stopped

One last try  
Want to cry  
Nothing.  
Just a dull ache.

Time skip, one year  
Nothing.  
And I still can't hate you  
I blame myself   
For what I felt  
For chasing you away  
You broke me down  
Crushed my heart

Why am I the one who must pay?


End file.
